Disclaimer: This is an review from a reviewer who has read The Satanic Witch by Anton LaVey, the frightening pink book that shares the secret and forbidden knowledge of the art of seduction and manipulation. This may or may not make the reviewer A Master Manipulator, close relative of Terminator. This review may or may not be the finest form of seduction and manipulation. The reviewer does not take any responsibility of the review's impact on the readers opinions of the book.

The Satanic Witch starts with the big bang. To know if you have the competence to make a career in the practice of the Devil's game, you need to answer to thirteen questions out of twenty. This nice quiz let's the reader choose which are the carefully selected questions to be answered. After taking the simplistic and hellish quiz, you will be guided to the answer section of the book. To get your momentous results, you need to hold your frightening pink book upside down and read it through the mirror.

Needless to say, I was too lazy to get up from my temporary sleeping place, known as the air bed (have you ever tried to get up from half flat air bed, if not, you are in no place to judge me), just to go and play mirror games with my Kindle. Or was I.

The Satanic Witch is mainly aimed for women and its sole purpose is not just to create an ideal witch but an ideal woman as well. What is an ideal witch (an woman), you may ask. As the book is written in the 70's, the ideal, naturally, comes from the same era. And to know what is the ideal, is to look at the media of the time as well as learn what was the role of the women at the time. This is an timeless formula as you can go with the flow and update yourself the same way you update your phones and browsers. Piece of cake.

Even The Satanic Witch is seemingly trying to help the women to be their best, in reality it is nothing but an attempt to manipulate multiple females to become, not just LaVey's but other men's, ideals just to have good fucking material around. It's all about sex and fucking material. You will eventually learn this, after all, you will become Master Manipulator, close relative of Terminator after finishing this book and making the needed changes to reach the ideal.

This reads as if LaVey tried to be an ancient occult leader, which I think was not a very successful attempt from his part. The writing was horrible. It was dry and boring (although, the excessive use of exclamation mark helped me to know when I was supposed to be excited and/or impressed), it had some major editing problems.

Some of the thought process in this book was agreeable, but as it relays on basic psychology and philosophy, there hardly is any reason to be in awe.

I am not sure what (and why) made me pick up this book, pure curiosity, but it is no doubt clear that me and LaVey met 15 years too late. My teenager brain could of have been more impressed by his work, but something in me says I would not count on that either.

No seriously, why this review is such as mess is because I am trying to find a spell to make Phil Anselmo to have sex with me. As I totally believe this bullshit to be true and worth the try. Yeah, right. Better luck next time, LaVey.

Review also posted at: http://hfk.booklikes.com/